Slartboz: The Danger Shades
When reality is subjective and perspectives are personal and private the smartest tech product companies will come to take advantage of it
Slartboz
I wanted to give another sneak preview of the world in my game Slartboz. In this post, you'll learn about a rather special device which is acually part of one of the major plot threads. A powerful artifact and everyday wearable from The Before Tymes (TM) -- and one possibly only a myth. Of course, Abro and his best frens (Bonk, Fern and the rest of The Lazer Lizards) eventually decide to go after it. For themselves. To use in their own wicked plans.
The Danger Shades
They say that reality is subjective. Truth itself is only relative. Facts are fuzzy and can be cherry-picked to taste. That success in life depends only on your own private internal perspectives or having the right (if secret) philosophy about it. That qualities like willpower & drive, flexibility & adaptability, personal grit & day-to-day resilience all matter most.
Well, with these sweet sunglasses on the above is all true anyway!
And what do they do, exactly?
When you put on and wear The Danger Shades, over your eyes, you won't be able to see *anything* which is a danger to you. Like a violent threat or potential source of bodily harm.
As a nice hack it means that if you *do* want to learn if some new person or lifeform you've just met is a Would-Be Predator (TM) or a Potential Enemy Real Soon Now (TM) then simply put on and take off these shades fast, before deciding how to proceed. Swipe on, swipe off -- like in Karate Kid but if he painted your face.
An encounter:
"Hey why did you do that?"
"What?"
"That thing. With the sunglasses. It was weird."
"Oh that... I thought there was glare. There wasn't. My bad. Am nerd, haha."
"Ah ok. Well like I was saying, I'm a knife salesman, I go door-to-door in neighborhoods hoping to sell my wares, and part of that is by doing an up-close and personal demonsration of the latest & greatest model of The Bowie Blade Mark VI by TacticoolTeams LLC, just look at the *sweet* sweet serrrated notches on that titanium-tungsten-forged baby, isn't she a beaut?"
You put on the glasses again just to double-check. The salesman continues his pitch, thankfully still quite visible to you, however slightly darker. They are sunglasses, after all.
However... you *didn't* notice the salesman's partner, Gron (who looks eerily like he could be a son or grandson of former Ex-President/Ex-Con Ronald B. Grump himself), quietly breaking in your backdoor and then quickly looting your livingroom & home Miss Office of all portable expensive electronics, during the short span of the knife salesman's perfectly paced and well-oiled talk on your front porch. Takeaway: The Danger Shades are no magic panacea. (Not without The Premium Upgrades Plus AAA Deluxe Enterprise Cloud Package Version anyway, and that model costs 1000x times as much and is restricted to a tiny list of approved "old money" family scions. As is The Way, and long before Disney's hit show began about a bounty hunter & his baby son.)
Likewise, while wearing The Danger Shades, none of the hidden, filtered-out sources can actually hurt you in reality. You are immune/invulnerable to them (specifically, and only.)
The combined feature applications for reconnaisance, threat assessment and limited/narrow (but total!) combat defense protection makes The Danger Shades one of the most highly prized artifacts of ancient Normerika's high tech wizardry. From when humanity had reached the peak of techno-marvel-logical advancement & sophistication, and released for public sale mere days before Taco Hells Bells announced a spiced-up major menu revamp and for the very last time ever -- just before civilization-wide collapse. Also, for the very last time ever.
The last feature of these sunglasses is that, no matter what, you'll look Really Cool wearing them. At least, you'll *feel* like you might look Really Cool. As we reviewed already: reality is all about perception. Especially (and only!) your own.
This Message has been brought to you by The Unserious Cybernetics Corporation of Texican-Mexas and Mars (founded 2040 CE), and, legally-speaking, *might* be a paid product advertisement, but crafted to serve as a story for reasons of plausible deniability. The destruction of the UCC's factories and revocation of its license to do biz in Normerika is a vicious rumor and we are currently operating productively out of a well-supplied bunker over 10 miles down beneath the surface of what-was-once Houston, and we *are* able to go online to check emails periodically, whenever Mom's surface WiFi link bridge is not acting too flaky. And NO thats not my real mother but rather a sentient AI named Mom, who is usually loving and warm and protective but sometimes gets Very Angry and tortures us cruelly oh Grod if you get this transmission please please come rescue us I only hope I can send this out before being det3fted by Her and gitting our link cu-@&39$&*@&@#...
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NOTE: I’m a fan of Douglas Adams and loved The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. The Danger Shades are my adaptation of similar ideas introduced to me in his books, but “riffed” upon like a musician and tailored to fit the world of Slartboz. Also a nod to Apple and Facebook’s attempts at VR cyberspaces and VR/AR-like goggles. If *you* are a fan of HHGG you might like to play my Slartboz game too! If you have never read HHGG you’ll be in for a real treat when you finally do.
The Slartboz game project page on Itch.io: